Stuart Reid

Stuart Reid

Award-winning children's author

Also writes as

Stuart Reid
Booking enquiry
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Available for

Workshop, Talk, Reading, Interview, Commission a book


Age 5 to 7, Age 7 to 11, Age 11 to 14


Adventure, Comedy, Fiction, Humour

Book types

Fiction 4-11


  • Silver Seal at the Forward National Literature Awards
  • Silver medal at the Wishing Shelf Book Awards 2019
  • Top Pick in Daily Record 2012
  • Top Pick in Daily Record 2013
  • Enterprise in Education Gold Award


Books by Stuart Reid

Stuart Reid is one of the busiest children’s authors in Britain, performing at 2,000 schools, libraries and book festivals throughout the UK, Ireland, Dubai, Abu Dhabi, Hong Kong, India and at the Adelaide Fringe in the last seven years. He has written eight books and has hosted over 250 book events at the Edinburgh Fringe. His book events are designed to engage & inspire children, especially boys 
and reluctant readers, to want to love reading, and Stuart’s largest live audience was 800 pupils aged between 5 and 11 years old. Stuart’s presentations are enthusiastic and inspirational; engaging pupils with audience participation, fun and energy. They are yucky, funny, imaginative and exciting enough to engage even the most reluctant of readers, yet with a stretching vocabulary that suits more developed children. His school presentations focus on the joys of reading and how brilliant books can be, as well as talking about recycling, alternative energy and even career advice.


Gorgeous George and the Giant Geriatric Generator

Bogies, baddies, bagpipes and bums! Farting, false teeth and fun! 
Gorgeous George and the Giant Geriatric Generator begins when George witnesses something rather disturbing from his bedroom window late one night. People are disappearing fast and no one seems to care. Why are the people of Little Pumpington so miserable? Why has his evil teacher started smelling of wee? Why is Mr Watt so fat? Why does Mr Jolly the Janitor collect hundreds of pairs of false teeth in a cupboard in his workshop? And will Grandpa Jock fill his pants if he squeezes a wee pump out too hard? During detention George discovers a secret stash of soggy tea-bags and a hundred boxes of broken biscuits hidden in a mysterious tunnel beneath the school. Can his new friend Allison help, even though she’s just ‘a boring girl’? Can Gorgeous George (who’s not really gorgeous at all) solve these mysteries with the help of his Grandpa Jock, the wild-haired ginger Scotsman before Grandpa Jock deafens the whole town with his bagpipes? Oh, and do not try the ‘Burning Bag of Poo Prank’ at home. You have been warned! 

Gorgeous George and the Zigzag Zit-faced Zombies

A chemical experiment by the military has gone wrong and the toxins are now airborne. The pupils of Little Pumpington primary school are breathing in the gas and going bonkers. Do you still pick your nose? Do you sit next to someone in school who still picks their nose? Do they eat it, even in secret, underneath their hand when they think no one else is watching? The nose-pickers are taking over the school and their own bogies are not enough; they need to eat everybody else’s too. Can Gorgeous George, Allison and Crayon Kenny find a cure before the military decide to blow up the school? With the help of Grandpa Jock, Ben and Barbara and a box full of the tissues, they must stop the snot-zombies biting their booger-crusted fingernails to the bone. Parents will not be able to read this book. This book is for strong-stomached children only so no wimps need apply. This is the last taboo known to mankind and way beyond the comprehension of adults. The older you are, the yuckier this book will be. You have been warned! Must.....have....bogiieeeeeeeeeeeeeees! 

Gorgeous George and the Unidentified Unsinkable Underpants Part 1

Pumping, plesiosaurs, porridge and pants! Monsters, mayhem and muck! Gorgeous George, Allison and Crayon Kenny are off to Loch Ness to take part in the World Porridge Championships but the locals are behaving rather strangely. Who wants to eat rabbit poo? And what will it taste like? Grandpa Jock has boil-washed his secret invention; whoopee cushion underpants, and he is hoping these no-nonsense knickers will protect his dainty little derriere on the long train journey up north. What’s inside the talking tent and who can toot the tastiest trouser trumpets? Why are all the lakes in England drying up? Why does the soil smell of wee? And can George write a poem so shocking that it makes a school teacher wet her pants? George may come up with the rudest rhymes he can think of but a saboteur is lurking with pots of exploding porridge. Will celebrity chef Heston Bloomingheck lose his eyebrows in the blaze? And just what have the three American scientists, Professor Marmaduke, Commander Chuck Choppers and Peewee Peterson discovered beneath the surface of Loch Ness? There’s something out there and it wees in the water! 

Gorgeous George and the Unidentified Unsinkable Underpants Part 2

Tension, tunnels, trouser trumpets and tears. Plesiosaurs, porridge and pants! Gorgeous George, Grandpa Jock and Crayon Kenny are in a boat on Loch Ness. Allison is actually in Loch Ness! Can she swim? Will she survive and was that really a monster in the water? It’s a serious start to a stinky story about secret submarines, strange smells and sea serpents. It’s poo, pee and pumps Ahoy! as Grandpa Jock whips off his whoopee cushion underpants and steals a truck to save the day. Three American scientists find out what’s lurking beneath the surface of Loch Ness and Professor Marmaduke, Commander Chuck Choppers and Peewee Peterson take our heroes along for a ride. How high can a dinosaur pee up a wall? Who can pump porridge? And who wants to wear Grandpa Jocks pants? Hopefully no-one will eat more rabbit poo in part two, as the World Porridge Championships have been poisoned and the saboteur is on the loose. And George and Kenny may just experiment with their own wee. More pee-wee, undersea whoopee in the continuing adventures of Gorgeous George and the Unidentified Unsinkable Underpants. 

Gorgeous George and the Jumbo Jobby Juicer

Burgers, bottoms, baddies and burps. Power pink, pumping and poop! The circus is coming to town and Grandpa Jock has almost wet himself with excitement. George’s suspicions are aroused when the circus elephants begin dumping piles of pink poo on the pavement. And the circus chimps are poop scooping the pink stuff into pails and taking it home. Is the delightful dung really just good for the garden or is there something more sinister going on? Why are all of the country’s elephants moving to a secret animal sanctuary? Why are the fields around Little Pumpington growing nothing but beetroot? Why are the burgers from McDoballs fast food restaurant so darn tasty? And what will happen to Crayon Kenny’s little brother now that he has stuck five plastic soldiers up his bum? (Don’t try this at home!) Grandpa Jock sniffs a mystery, George sniffs the elephants’ fear and Crayon Kenny sniffs his little toy soldiers. Is Allison the only sane person in the town? Even she is becoming addicted to the latest range of delicious cheeseburgers, chips and the new energy drink, Power Pink. More poo, pee and pumps with Gorgeous George so strong stomachs need only apply.  

Gorgeous George and his Stupid Stink Stories

Long stories, short stories, tall stories, funny stories. Yucky stories, lucky stories and even some mucky stories. Stories good enough to grace any book. Stories gross enough to make you want to puke. There are scary tales. There are hairy tales. There are even some scary, hairy fairytales! There are stories about zombies, stories about ghosts and even stories about old people falling in love (bleugh). The longest short story is this book has 16 pages, so easy to read at bedtime. The shortest short story in this book has just 8 words, so you can read that one on the toilet! And if you haven’t guessed already, this book is cheeky. Some grannies might think this book is a little bit rude (like the lady from Inverness who was so shocked she wet herself). I promised her that my next book would carry a WARNING, so here goes… WARNING: This book contains words like BUM, POO, BARF and WEE. 
Do NOT read this book if you are easily offended. Please do not wet yourself - You have been warned!  

Gorgeous George and the Timewarp Trouser Trumpets

Have you ever wanted a book so exciting it keeps you up past your bedtime? A story so mad that you’re scared to put it down in case the adventure goes on inside the pages, on its own, even after you’ve stopped reading? Well, you’ve found it. Grandpa Jock has made one of his world-famous killer curries using the magic beans that his grandson George swapped for a cow costume with a small leprechaun. Mad enough for you yet? But now their bottoms are about to blow and these time travelling trouser trumpets just might transport Gorgeous George and Grandpa Jock anywhere. Or any when! This book is a big ball of wibbly-wobbly, timey-wimey stuff - Who said that? - as the story loops and swoops and poops, and pops out to the shops, then meets itself coming back again. Crayon Kenny and Allison are tracking down that mad leprechaun, there’s a talking parrot who never shuts up, and of course, there are two cute, fluffy, evil little kittens. And bottom burps. Lots and lots of big bottom burps. So much wind that you’ll be glad that this is NOT a scratch and sniff book! So what are you waiting around here for - START READING! 

Grandpa Jock and the Incredible Iron-Bru-Man Incident

How would you feel if aliens landed in your back garden? What would you do if the Men in Black turned up at your front door? Probably poop your pants! (I know I would). And not just one alien. An entire army of aliens… ancient aliens… awesome aliens… Four different species of aliens, each ready to rule the world, save the world, stop the world or eat every last person on the planet! What the world needs now is a new brand of superhero! Super-duperheroes, and super-sheroes… all younger, more dynamic, more adventurous and willing to risk life and limb to leap over a paddling pool full of pee. Grandpa Jock makes an impressive superhero landing in his first fist-pounding, heart-pumping adventure in the Gorgeous George universe. The usual suspects, George, Allison and Crayon Kenny are there, along with the welcome return of those cool kids next door, Ben and Barbara. If you’ve never read a Gorgeous George adventure before, first of all, WHY NOT? and second of all, start with this one. It’s like an instruction manual… This book might just save your planet!